If you, want me, you got to know me
And if you want my love (My love) you gotta wait my love
Ba Baby that’s the way its got to be
Get to know me (Get to know me) so we can do this,
MONICA – FIRST NIGHT
Ladies let me be the first to tell you…just because you make a man wait for sex doesn’t mean it will change anything. The most important thing, no matter of how long you wait is HOW YOU CARRY YOURSELF AFTER THE SEX. The problem is a lot of women cannot have casual sex without some type of emotional attachment or feeling towards the partner. Ladies, if you have casual sex then continue to hold your head high. Just because you had sex with a man casually doesn’t mean you’re a hoe. Walk with confidence, self-assurance, and still hold yourself in high regard. I know what you ladies are thinking… “If I give it up early then he’s going to think I’m a hoe.” In some cases you are right, but there’s a big difference in those who carry themselves as HOES and those who carry themselves as a LADY. The difference is…A LADY STILL DEMANDS HER RESPECT! Regardless if you just had sex with that man you still are a human being. It is not illegal for a woman to just want to have sex. Now it is illegal for you just to have casual sex with everybody and everybody knows it. THEREIN LIES DIFFERENCE!
What baffles me is women who go into a situation with a set time limit. That is the wrong way to start a situation. Another reason this time limit women might put up does not mean the relationship will grow. Communication is key!!! As I stated in a previous post, don’t let time go past and you don’t have that talk with him and then he has his own conclusion. It’s ok for you to have been horny at the time and wanted sex. However, if you want more than that let it be known. You might not like the rebuttal but at least you’re not going to be sold a dream from being naïve.
Let me teach you all something. As a man when his mind is made up it is made up! If a man meets you and realizes all he wants is the sex…sweetheart the time you set don’t mean nothing! You can set whatever time limit you want, that man is going to be doing him while doing just enough to keep you happy until your time limit is over and he gets the goods. Let me tell you, if you think a grown man is going to wait more than 6 months and not have sex then you are slightly confused. Everybody has needs it, including women, and even 6 months without sex for some women is difficult. It’s one thing to lie to me but it’s total disrespect to lie to yourself. I’ve heard that some females wait a guy out because after sex a lot of guys get complacent. But if he’s going to become complacent then the time doesn’t matter.
Now I’m not saying that sex is so important that your relationship should be based upon it. However, I am saying that it is very important. I had a woman tell me if he is the “one” he will wait. Well then 90% of the men are not the “one.” I don’t judge women who have casual sex. In my mind you wanted to have sex. However, when you begin to have casual sex with people who you have no clue of who they are, that’s then the hoe line is crossed. If you have sex with a dude because of something he has, i.e. nice car, nice clothes, money, then you’re crossing that line again. If you have casual sex with a dude and keep that business to yourself then you are not a hoe. Women everywhere do it.
The problem arises because most women are trained/brainwashed from an early age….to make men wait…”if he feels you’re worth it he will wait.” As a woman you are taught to tie our self-worth to our sexuality…basically..don’t give it up. In the, so called, “Commandments to Womanhood” women are supposed to be virtuous and modest…anything other than that..she’s a hoe…and no one wants that label. Those laws also say “all guys are only after one thing…and in order to prove we’re worth more..we’re told to wait.” However, I beg to differ. That is not how many men feel. Yes we like sex, who doesn’t, but that’s not always ALL we want. However if it is waiting a certain amount of time before giving it up is not going to change a man’s feelings about you. If he likes you and it’s sincere then no matter when he gets the sex, his feeling aren’t going to change. But you will feel like a fool when you wait those 6 months and he still plays you as if it were the first night.
I know you’re not that type and I want to do this right but does waiting really make us better people –Drake “shut it down”