Can a relationship work if your friend doesnt like her…?
There are many factors that go into this question. The first question at hand is do you really consider these people to be brothers? (Refer to The G Code on the blog site) Everybody you may consider your brother may not be your brother. Second question is do you truly know your significant other? If you cannot answer yes to both of these initial questions then your relationship will not last regardless. I say that because not knowing these people you calling brother, will lead to BAD advice. Not knowing your significant other speaks for itself. If you don’t know the person that you’re involved with emotionally, physically, and spiritually then you have no clue the capabilities that this person has.
I have witnessed too many times a relationship ending due to friends not approving of the relationship. This can go both ways. But, like I said in The G Code you have to know which friend has your best interest at heart. You cannot go to the friend that is a male hoe and expect him to give you positive feedback about a relationship. You also could really have haters in your circle. It could be honest hate to the fact that you are happy in your relationship and he has failed to find a person to make him happy. However, just like I said to females, fellas we have to watch WHAT we are telling the circle concerning the ins and outs of the relationship. If you come to the circle with ALL NEGATIVITY, then of course the circle has nothing else to go by but negative. This is going to lead to them not approving of the significant other. It is very possible for people to take on your feelings towards a relationship and stay that way. You might be apologetic or forgiving towards your partner but your friends may refuse to feel the same way you do. But, you also do not want to be naïve of the truth. Being that these are your brothers you do expect them to have your best interest at heart. It is also possible for a person to FORCE HAPPINESS. Do not fall victim to this. You can never fit a square into a circle. But you can cut off edges until that square becomes a circle. However, comes the question, will you love this new circle the same as you loved the square, are you happy being a circle when you really are a square? Don’t lose yourself for a relationship.
On the other hand, if you truly know your significant other, as you should, than nothing else matters. If your friends are saying things that are blatantly out of character for them and has never been an issue before then you know who should have your trust. When you reach the point of happiness and you’re on cloud 9 then the opinions of your friends does not matter. The only negative about being on cloud 9 is the potential of falling off that cloud and back down to reality. When you realize that the person you thought you knew turns out to be someone totally different. Then you have to face your friends that did not approve of this significant other. A real friend will not throw it in your face but you never know. Especially if it’s a specific reason your circle didn’t like her (i.e. rumors of cheating) and you’ll broke up due to her cheating on you…then comes the “I told you so.”
I can personally say I want the approval of my circle in my relationship. I mean who wouldn’t? These are the people who are going to be standing beside me during my wedding. What if I get married to this woman that nobody approves of? It’s going to be awkward for everybody. But we have to be realistic, everybody is not meant to like everybody and sometimes personalities just clash. (That may be true of one or two friends vs your sig. other…but can’t be all) I feel as if respect and like are two different things. So, lets switch like with respect. As long as my brother’s can respect my relationship then I would feel alright. I say alright because I want my significant to be cool with my circle. I’m not everyone though. However, I do feel as if from the outside looking in people close to you can notice a lot of things that a person in love with may just look over. When some people fall in love, they are blinded by it. Consequently, this leads some people to overlook things that they once would’ve considered as disrespect for the relationship. Wrong is always wrong and right will always be right and your friends may just be trying to remind you of that.
We also have to put the shoe on the foot and think about all the strife the female is going through with her friends. Being that most males have a deeper past than females, it is much easier for females to judge a male while he is in a relationship. Most men struggle with their significant others friends due to the negative situations being highlighted in the relationship. Our significant other can dig a hole so deep in her friend’s mind that it’s impossible for us to get out. So as a man we attempt to make everyone happy. Let me be the first to tell you, DO NOT ATTEMPT TO MAKE EVERYBODY HAPPY! The truth might be that you are really trying to do the right thing but that is the last thing women are going see from the outside looking in. How would we react if our significant other stopped dealing with us due to her friends? You know our favorite quote, “Fa real, f*** your friends” will be the first thing out our mouth. But then comes the factor of…is what the friends saying true?
I think it boils down to truly knowing the people you interact with on an everyday basis. If you don’t really know the people in your circle is it a circle? If you don’t truly know your significant other, is she really significant? Let’s reevaluate our relationships with everybody in our life and then I feel as if you can rank the differences of opinions. Because whether we like it or not everybody is going to have an opinion of your relationship. Do not shy away from positive criticism which indeed could positively affect your relationship. It could be bad or good but there is absolutely nothing you can do to quiet the critics. Just take the good with the bad and always remind yourself of the information you have received and watch your own back…