Marvin’s Room

June 22, 2011

Marvin’s Room

I’m a tell you the reason every man has been in Marvin’s Room somehow or someway.  You have been hated on by another man, you have hated on the man that is now dating the one you lost or you’ve been drunk and did something you normally wouldn’t do.

Hated on by another man

No matter who you’re dealing with they have a past and have dealt with another person before you.  Depending on how the break up went there is a 80% chance that her ex is not very pleased with her new relationship.  The question I present it…Is it really hating?  I honestly don’t think so.  I would say it is a natural reaction.  It could be compared to a reflex.  You’re taught if a person hits you, you hit them back.  Why in God’s green earth would you be excited for your ex being happy with another person.  Especially when you’re… “Uh, cups of the XO, All my people been here, I see all of her friends here, Guess she don’t have the time to kick it no more.”  Now, you can lie to me, but you cannot lie to yourself.  When a breakup happens you begin to notice everything that you did not notice when you’ll was together.  I don’t consider “hating”, an ex wanting his/her ex back.  I consider it a natural reaction that love will cause you to display.  Hate is a feeling towards a person you have no reason to dislike.

Hating on the man who stole your ex

Although it is a natural reaction towards losing the one that was once yours.  Do not get it twisted and think that it is alright.  The problem arises when you’ve reached the point where you’ve realized he/she is gone and you still “hating” on their new relationship.  “I want to see you happy even if it isn’t with me” is easier said than done.  Nobody, especially men, want to see a person they dealt with to deal with ANYBODY other than them.  We don’t care how long the break up has been.  The most difficult time is the mixed signals are being thrown out there such as… “F-ck that nigga that you love so bad, I know you still think about the times we had, I say f-ck that nigga that you think you found, And since you picked up I know he’s not around.” When you still try to remain friends with an ex and they are in a new relationship…in their face you try to act happy for them because they’re happy but deep down you’re feeling like “F-ck that nigga that you love so bad…” The friendship can be misconstrued as a mixed signal because even though you are pretending you let go you actually haven’t and every time you all talk, or text, or share a joke, deep down it gives you the false hope that they’ll see what they had and want you back. When these mixed signals are thrown it messes with people’s minds and goes in the category of selling dreams.  This goes without saying…selling dreams is negative no matter how you view it.  Dreams are a figment of your imagination and should never be involved in relationships.  If it’s not reality then don’t mention it.  Dreams in a relationship are equal if not greater than bad credit. Without credit of the words you are saying then you will not get the sale.

Drunken words are sober thoughts

The entire song seems to be all drunken words.  Whenever you tell the person you’re dealing with “We threw a party, yeh we threw a party, Bitches came over, yeh, we threw a party, I was just calling cause they were just leaving, Talk to me please, don’t have much to believe in.”  You are clearly drunk or desperate and begging for attention. This might catch the attention of a female who still have feelings but IF you’re dealing with a mature female she probably picked up the phone just to make sure you’re ok and will notice this cry for attention fast and end the conversation.

Most women SAY they want their man to be real.  However, in all reality there is a such thing as WHEN KEEPING IT REAL GOES WRONG… “I need you right now, are you down to listen to me?, Too many drinks have been given to me, I got some women thats living off me, Paid for their flights and hotels I’m ashamed, Bet that you know them, I won’t say no names, After a while girl they all seem the same, I’ve had sex four times this week I’ll explain.”  There is no way you can honestly think any woman is going to be ok with you telling her this.  Oh yeah, but women want us to keep it real.

Men and women we have to be honest not only with one another but more importantly with ourselves.  Everyone has jealous tendencies.  In the era we live in, hating is a big problem amongst our age range.  It is importance we recognize what hate is and what being a human being is.  In conclusion, it is alright to show emotion.  It is natural for us as humans to fall in and out of love.  Let’s just stay away from doing it the crazy way… “Her white friend said “you niggas crazy”, I hope no-one heard that, I hope no-one heard that, Cause if they did, we gon be in some trouble”…

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Seeking Attention

June 2, 2011

It’s crazy in the world we live in, women who beg for attention in the negative form receive it, over those women with morals and who actually deserve the attention.  Daily I see on twitter women tweeting something negative about themselves and wait for a man to fall for it.  For example, a woman may tweet “I really don’t like the way I look” and best believe there will be one man who tweets “Babe you know you are sexy.”  She knew exactly when she tweeted that statement that she was going to get the attention that she so desperately needed. 

Both males and females are to blame for these women begging for attention.  The reason being, it takes both parties for this situation to happen.  If she begs for the attention and gets it, then the outcome will be her continuing this begging.  It is up to us as a men to let these females know that attention will be given when attention is deserved.  It is beginning to make other females who deserve it look bad in these streets.  We as men have to support our females out here doing the right things. 

Men struggle at being able to differentiate between when a woman is faking and when she’s real.  Now I’m not going to completely blame men for making this costly mistake (which usually leads to a terrible relationship).  This is directly stemming from females being GREAT at being somebody that they are not.  Women have the ability to fake something so well that it is difficult, almost impossible, for men (with our simple minds) to know the truth.  Men are black and white and struggle tremendously with thinking outside of that box.  It is either we going right or left. However with women, more or less, they don’t know where the hell they going for real.  Men struggle with saying no to a woman who puts emphasis on the fact that they supposedly have yams or good head.  We also struggle with a woman being immature or a drama queen, and we do anything we can to stop the madness. Usually going along with what she wants for the sake of peace. And last but not least…the WORLD FAMOUS TWEET… “I’M LONELY!”  Woman who act like this get what they want and it makes it seem as if that’s the way to act when men give them the attention they were seeking from the start.  This consequently leads to a good woman going bad (in a sense).  And we all know… “they say you can’t turn a bad girl good, but once a good girls gone bad, she’s gone forever.” –Jay-Z – Song Cry

It is time for our strong women to begin the takeover.  It is time for these basic women to stop taking all the good men from you.  But most importantly, it is time for our good men to recognize that we are usually with the wrong woman due to our simple mindsets and not wanting to do what it takes to get and keep a good woman. We are so quick to pull the trigger on a woman that is easy and wants us.  Ladies, if a man quits due to you being “hard to get” then it’s on to the next one.  It is perfectly fine for a woman to put up a guard and be hard to get.  Usually woman who do that have major rights to do so and who wants a wife who is easy.  More than likely you are not the first man she has been easy with.  Men contradict themselves so much.  We claim to not want a girl who is out there, but then go mess with a girl that’s out there.  Even worse, we mess around and wife her because you don’t want to struggle with fighting for a good girl.  If we as men are going to claim to be this “good” man then it is time we allow ourselves to win. Ladies and gentlemen, LOSERS DEAL WITH LOSERS and that’s the bottom line.  If you claim to be WINNING and you mess with a LOSER…then by default you are a LOSER as well!  Let’s start winning together instead of making the same mistakes…